When you first met your partner, you were amazed by how much you had in common. As you raved about how you both liked the same bands and even made your coffee the same way, you never dreamed that you would clash on major decisions. That was, until you became parents. Now, you find yourself questioning your partner's every move, and they can't believe you could ever be so uptight. So how do you get from fighting about raising your child to loving each other again? Use these three strategies to find a beautiful compromise that will increase your family's bond.
Focus On The Primary Goal
One of the first steps toward growing together as parents is to recognize that you both agree that raising your child to be healthy and happy is the most important thing in the world. However, having two parents who constantly bicker will eventually interfere with your child's development. When things get heated regarding parenting decisions, take a step back and remember that growing up in a peaceful environment is more important for a child's happiness than having a specific bedtime or curfew.
Agree to Keep Criticism Private
Children must know that they can trust their parents to make the best decisions, whether they lean toward giving them more freedom or restrictions. Avoid making your partner look bad in front of the kids, and insist that they do the same. In some instances, negative communication patterns have led to conflicts in your family that have begun to influence your child's behavior. For example, your child may have begun to rebel against the stricter parent's rules, and seeking family counseling is essential for helping everyone to learn how to interact in a more positive manner.
Acknowledge the Positive Points
As challenging as it may be, it is important to recognize the strengths that your partner brings to the table for raising your child. For instance, a parent who adopts a free range style gives your child room to learn independence. Alternatively, a parent who establishes more rules teaches your child to learn to deal with boundaries. Either way, your child is learning important lessons about life, and your two different styles help to balance each other out.
Finding a healthy compromise between two drastically different parenting styles takes work, and it is normal to wonder how you will ever see eye to eye. Remember that family counseling is an option that will offer a neutral perspective on how to raise your child. By choosing to work together, your child will grow up knowing that they have the full support of two parents who care enough about their happiness to learn how to mend their differences. Contact a company like Fairbanks Counseling & Adoption to learn more.Share