Although nobody enters a marriage with the expectation that it will end in divorce, sometimes married couples discover that they are truly better off going their separate ways. No matter how much you want the divorce or how unhappy you may have been in the marriage, getting divorced is going to inevitably bring a degree of pain and stress into your life. It's often a time when many people choose to start therapy to cope with the challenging transition. When getting started, try these tips to get the most out of your experience in therapy.
Tip #1: Express Yourself - It's Okay to Feel However You Do
No therapist is going to judge feelings alone. It's all right to feel however it is that you are feeling, and therapy is a safe place where you can express any positive or negative emotion under the sun. If you feel only anger at your ex, that's okay, too. After a divorce, sometimes you'll feel good, and talking about that in therapy can help you pinpoint where your new sources of joy originate. It can all be a part of dealing with your "new normal."
Express exactly how you are feeling throughout each therapy session. If you hide your feelings and try to tell the therapist what you think they want to hear, you are cheating yourself of the opportunity to work through your feelings and go further along your journey of healing.
Tip #2: Ask for What You Want – You Just Might Get It
When you are starting therapy, you may feel very vulnerable. After all, the therapist is in a position of authority, and you may be dealing with a power struggle as part of the divorce. However, you have a lot of control in therapy. You can ask your psychologist for what you want out of therapy. No psychologist can promise any specific results, but many therapists like the idea of working towards goals. You can even work with the therapist to set specific therapy goals that you would like to achieve.
Tip #3: Speak Up – Your Therapist Will Hear You Out
When you don't agree with your therapist on any issue, it's okay to talk about it. You may not change your psychologist's mind, but you might. Your therapist is only human and is interested in your opinion as part of therapy. As a part of active listening, your therapist may put something you've said into their own words. That's your chance to explain if they have misunderstood you. It's alright to speak up when you think that they don't understand any part of your pain over the divorce, too. If you disagree with any part of the discussion, it's okay to talk about it.
Finally, keep in mind that everyone has a unique experience in therapy. Speak to your therapist about any concerns or questions that you have. Your psychologist is a partner in healing who has your best interests at heart and is rooting for your progress. Therapy is a safe place where you can express all the many feelings that are sure to come up after a divorce. For more information on counseling, contact a location such as Comprehensive Behavioral Health Associates Inc.Share